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The one I recall from my mother's service is Beyond the Sunset; another oldie that is upbeat is Mansion Over the Hilltop (Ira Stanphill), also Just a Closer Walk with Thee. It also depends on whether there are other old-timers there that remember the oldies.
Hello, I'm so sorry for your loss. Here are a few thoughts.
You Lift Me Up youtube.com/watch?v=xj8wHfBKoRU I'll Fly Away youtube.com/watch?v=grV3zPU7kdc Danny Boy youtube.com/watch?v=DquA6KyHTos
Try to Remember by Perry Como (more our parent's generation) youtube.com/watch?v=d5R7jk2sw4M&list=PL1EA3C96E65094E6C&index=3 The Last Farewell by Roger Whittaker youtube.com/watch?v=hKdRpDpIR70&list=RDhKdRpDpIR70#t=0
I am not especially religious, so for myself I have chosen "Shall We Gather at the River," as the UU church of which I am a member is located on the banks of the Mississippi River. Also, Cat Stevens' rendition of "Morning Has Broken." Then I like Beethoven's "Ode to Joy," and Frank Sinatra's "My Way."
We did Amazing Grace, How Great Thou Art, but we also did a song called Holes In the Floors of Heaven by Steven Wariner because my mom loved that song. I've also been to funerals and have heard the song Spirit In The Sky. Personalize it for how you see that it fits the person.
It really depends on the person, their beliefs and wishes. If Christian, I would recommend: The Old Rugged Cross, Amazing Grace, songs of that nature, for an elderly person, as those were the hymns of their time and for a while after. Loud and fast was not the norm and would considered disrespectful to their peers.
My mom wanted Precious Lord Take my Hand and also Go rest high on that mountain by Vince Gill was a beautiful song. My grandmother wanted Old Rugged cross So sorry for your loss
my parents were both very religious, which worked with my mom but when it came time for my dad, maybe it was our own doing since he was the last, while with for mom we just pretty much let her/their church guy who normally did the singing for them just sing pretty much whatever he wanted but for dad we'd found out the song that was sung at his mom's - that he was close to - and was hoping to have him sing it but...guess maybe we should have prepared him; we'd found it out several months before but just never thought about that; anyway he said he didn't know it and seems like couldn't find it online (though seems like did later; trying now to remember what it was - O, What a Blessed Day? maybe - but anyway, not only that but he also said he was no longer the song leader for the church, like that mattered why? but then he went on and said he at least had a sore throat and just really couldn't sing, hm..I don't know, it just seemed like he just didn't really want to - granted, as I'm sure you here, of all people would understand, he hadn't been to church for 2 yrs. at that point but still he'd gone there for fifty before but oh well so we didn't really know what to do, so while sitting around then trying to decide, I can somewhat understand whoever said it's really about the mourners rather than the one who's passed away, dad wasn't really going to know anyway and his grandson was the one who was really left; he'd been the one taking care of dad for those past two years, so his best friend and his wife; well, really she was the one who mentioned the song Go Rest High on than Mountain - that was their type music; I just wasn't familiar with it, but it seemed to fit and I think wasn't too far off for dad, either, though I did hate what had seemed to happen. A song I had wanted for a long time ever since I heard it was one that a minister in my church - which had become somewhat different, though I'd like to think not too terribly so in some ways - had written called The Old Man in the Chair in the Yard - dad was 95 when he passed so pretty he'd quality - it was about him sitting and just being passed by, which was pretty much how things had gone for him those last couple years, though not quite in the yard but on his back deck, which might explain, maybe if he'd been in his front yard, but anyway, and there were back neighbors but oh well, but, again, should have gotten it together, again, maybe as soon as heard it because turned out the man who wrote it had never recorded it, even had a friend who was in the area, but also turned out we - as in our church where I'd heard it - oh, also an interesting twist on it was I got the call, not the final one where he passed but the one that started us on the beginning of the final journey even as he was singing it - were the ones who'd recorded it then so we'd had it the whole time, just glad that friend was coming back and then coming - forgot to mention I, with dad, was in a yet different state 5 hrs. away - to the funeral so picked it up and brought it, sliding in at the 11th hour, just in time - well, we actually played the other one first - and, yes, both were on CD; the funeral home had that one but of course not this one; they were sweating, but if she hadn't shown not sure what would have done, maybe nothing, maybe just picked on off the list, or something that was known - but she made it - something dad wouldn't have really wanted; he wanted live but just turned into that, hopefully not too upset; however, having said all that, another thing that had happened was his pastor had no longer been there, although we did get him back for his funeral but he'd gotten a new one who'd been there just 6 weeks at that point but thanks to someone who thought a lot of dad in the church had made a point to bring him up to date on dad, even bringing him out to see him so that when he'd wound up in the hospital about a month later and in there for 2 weeks before he passed - after coming home on hospice for just a day - was there pretty much immediately and then was at the house to meet us when we got there - just meant so much - since the old song leader was no more - I think there was a connection but anyway - he was leading the singing and offered to do something like that, if we'd like - he said he wasn't a "special" singer, as they called them and like that other song leader was, so he couldn't sing a solo - so even though it's been called "trite" on here; I'd never heard it done this way and not at all, except my cousin did at my grandmother's graveside - but he led us all in "Amazing Grace", a song I guess I just thought everybody knew and hopefully almost everybody did but now I'm somewhat wondering about a side of my family of a different religion, the same as son's gf, who I had no idea would have no idea about that song; I did feel so bad for her about that, however, it was the one part of the service I felt was exactly what "dad" would have wanted; we conceded the rest to the "mourners", if you will, because of what had happened but that ended it as I feel dad would have wanted - sorry
For a Christian funeral, my favorite hymn is "Softly and Tenderly." Softly and tenderly Jesus is calling, Calling for you and for me. See on the portals He's waiting and watching, Watching for you and for me.
Come home! Come home! Ye who are weary come home. Earnestly, tenderly Jesus is calling. Calling "O sinner come home"
O for the wonderful love He has promised Promised for you and for me Though we have sinned He has mercy and pardon Pardon for you and for me
This probably won’t help, but it was good for us. First we had an organ version of ‘Sheep may safely graze’, because Mum loved it. Then a song called ‘Music Makers’ that she sang in college. We finished up with a doozy: ‘Wonderful Wonderful Copenhagen’ from the film of Hans Christian Anderson. When we were children, we sang with Mum around the piano before bed, and the final ‘going to bed’ song was always ‘Wonderful Copenhagen’. It sounded strangely upbeat at the funeral, but my sisters and I all hugged and laughed and cried together, so people knew it meant something to us all. My beloved aunt had already chosen for hers: ‘Thank you for the music’ because she loved ABBA and that song, and Judith Durham from the Seekers singing the Lord’s Prayer because she also loved the Seekers. So it can work if you pick for your loved one and their loved ones, not for the audience.
"Hallelujah"(sp?) By Leonard Cohan. It is sung by various artist. He explained what the song meant to him..It explains that many kinds of hallelujahs do exist, and all the perfect and broken hallelujahs have equal value." Leonard Cohen. My parent's want amazing grace but no words just bag pipes. Also " I Can Only Imagine" this one is religious but very pretty. I cry when I hear it. Also " One more Light" by Linkin Park( no its not a rock song. It is about when someone dies an who cares? " Well I do" at the end. Beautiful. Just some suggestions. Im sorry you are having to even think of this. Both my parents have wrote down what they want for each service. At first they wanted burial. Now they want creamated. Totally diff service for creamation. An almost all their friends an relatives have passed. Both 83 an married for 61 yrs. We may just have a " wake" where family is at one place an people can cone by to pay respects an maybe have some pics there of Mom or Dad fr birth through their life. Fav flowers. Or like for my Dad, he was a cowboy. A real buckaroo. Rodeo bareback rider. Won a buckle. Made saddles by hand an chaps etc...we would have that kind of stuff an his "wake". Goodluck
I have sung at Nursing homes for years both with church choirs and secular ones. Some beautiful songs the church choirs sing are "Precious Lord, Take My Hand", "Since Jesus Came Into Heart" and "When The Roll Is Called Up Yonder" and the residents seem to like them. However, for my own funeral, I particularly want the WWII classic popularized by the great British singer Vera Lynn--- "I'll Be Seeing You", "You'll Never Walk Alone" from "Carousel" and "I'll Walk Alone" by the great Jane Froman. I want people at my funeral to hear the beautiful music of the Gershwins, Jerome Kern, etc. before rap music entirely takes over.
We had Dad's memorial service a month after he passed away. Dad had asked that his boatswain's whistle be used to "Pipe the Side". I had to learn how to do that, quickly, and prayed that I did it justice without squeaking, plus warning those present to watch their ears! We closed his service with a rousing rendition of When The Saints Go Marching In.
I recently attended the memorial service aka "celebration of life" for a dear friend. His adult children and grandchildren played the song "Here Comes the Sun" by the Beatles, with photos of my friend and his family members flashing on a video screen. It was absolutely beautiful. Very uplifting and moving.
Coming up FAST on being an 'elderly parent' - myself, I haven't set foot in a church in decades and don't know sh*t about hymns . If *I* ever did have a funeral, I would like 'Long and Winding Road' and 'Mull of Kintyre' for the sad slow songs....there are a few more peppy songs to play after they plant me in the ground, as my mourners go out to tip a few and get a free meal....
'In My Life' by the Beatles is lovely, but still sad...how about 'Spirit in the Sky' - everyone has to clap their hands along with the music, and sing! 'Operator' by Manhattan Transfer is another great one: 'operator? long distance...get me Jesus on the line' - another uplifting gospel type thing!
My dad wants the roy Orbison song 'pretty woman' played as loud as possible as he is being laid to rest...My mom passed a few years ago and he is expecting her to come get him when the time is here for him to join her. I'm bringing the loudest sound system I can! You gotta love it! Blessings to all, Lindaz.
Lassie--I hadn't heard "Operator" for over 35 years. I never knew who did this song, but after reading your comment I went to YouTube and listened to several versions of it. Thanks for mentioning this song!
Agree with all how have said...WHATEVER they enjoyed. There aren't any set rules stating that a funeral has to be somber; just look at how funerals are traditionally done in New Orleans.
As for me, I want a snarky comedian give my eulogy. Reason: look at the 1st 3 letters in FUNERAL...FUN!
If you are looking for a Country and Western song, listen to “Can the circle be unbroken”. It is one of the most famous Carter family songs, written for their mother’s funeral. Johnny Cash (Carter relative by marriage) does a more modern version.
If I could edit I would - or maybe not since I wrote such a book before but I remembered my granma's song we wanted for my dad - O What a Beautiful Day for the Lord to come again (not O What a Blessed Day) seems kinda sad, can't remember if had found the lyrics or just didn't really look at it close, too busy trying to find the music, so not really sure but it would have been special
My dad, who loved the sea, died in 2007 at age 87. I had known for years that the song I would play at his memorial would be Shiver Me Timbers by Tom Waits. Here are the lyrics:
I'm leavin' my family And leavin' my friends My body's at home But my heart's in the wind Where the clouds are like headlines On a new front page sky My tears are salt water And the moon's full and high And I know Martin Eden's Gonna be proud of me And many before me Who've been called by the sea To be up in the crow's nest And singin' my say Shiver me Timbers I'm a-sailin' away The fog's liftin' And the sand's shiftin' And I'm driftin' on out And Ol' Captain Ahab Ain't got nothin' on me So come on and swallow me, don't follow me I travel alone Blue water's my daughter And I'm gonna skip like a stone And please call my missus Tell her not to cry My goodbye is written By the moon in the sky
And nobody knows me I can't fathom my stayin' And shiver me timbers I'm a-sailin' away And the fog's liftin' And the sand's shiftin' And I'm driftin' on out Ol' Captain Ahab He ain't got nothin' on me So come on and swallow me, don't follow me I travel alone Blue water's my daughter And I'm skippin' like a stone
And I'm leavin' my family And I'm leavin' my friends My body's at home But my heart's in the wind Where the clouds are like headlines On a new front page sky And shiver me timbers I'm a-sailin' away
Kinkytail Your song lyrics for your dad reminded me of a cowboy song I always thought would have been perfect for my dad.
“ When the Sun Sets on the Sage”. By Commander Cody
When the sun sets on the sage I'll say how do you do That's when cowboys go to sleep, oh dee, oh ee ley ee who And my pony will be waiting in the dust for me Say adiós when the sun sets on the sage
Fare thee well, Oh fare thee well I'll say goodbye to you Supper's waiting on the table, oh dee, oh ee ley ee who And the cattle, they are roaming, going home to rest Say adiós when the sun sets on the sage
The sky is all aglow, the shadows are falling Now it's high time to go, hear those gentle voices calling
No more weeping, no more tears, I want a smile from you We'll be parted for a while, oh dee, oh ee ley ee who But our hearts will still remember that our love was true Say adiós when the sun sets on the sage
1. "We Remember You" Words and Music by Walt Harrah, Arranged by Lloyd Larson 2. "How Great Thou Art" ~ Lyrics ~ Carl Boberg, 1859 - 1940 ~ English Translation ~ Stuart K. Hine, 1899 - 1989
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
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APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
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1. "His Eye Is On The Sparrow" Her Favorite song
2. "Some Where Over The Rainbow"
3. "How Great Thou Are"
4. "Peace Be Still"
These songs were very uplifting for me and others.
You Lift Me Up youtube.com/watch?v=xj8wHfBKoRU
I'll Fly Away youtube.com/watch?v=grV3zPU7kdc
Danny Boy youtube.com/watch?v=DquA6KyHTos
Try to Remember by Perry Como (more our parent's generation)
youtube.com/watch?v=d5R7jk2sw4M&list=PL1EA3C96E65094E6C&index=3
The Last Farewell by Roger Whittaker youtube.com/watch?v=hKdRpDpIR70&list=RDhKdRpDpIR70#t=0
I hope this helps at a difficult time.
Softly and tenderly Jesus is calling,
Calling for you and for me.
See on the portals He's waiting and watching,
Watching for you and for me.
Come home! Come home!
Ye who are weary come home.
Earnestly, tenderly Jesus is calling.
Calling "O sinner come home"
O for the wonderful love He has promised
Promised for you and for me
Though we have sinned He has mercy and pardon
Pardon for you and for me
Come Home, come home
Ye who...
There aren't any set rules stating that a funeral has to be somber; just look at how funerals are traditionally done in New Orleans.
As for me, I want a snarky comedian give my eulogy. Reason: look at the 1st 3 letters in FUNERAL...FUN!
I'm leavin' my family
And leavin' my friends
My body's at home
But my heart's in the wind
Where the clouds are like headlines
On a new front page sky
My tears are salt water
And the moon's full and high
And I know Martin Eden's
Gonna be proud of me
And many before me
Who've been called by the sea
To be up in the crow's nest
And singin' my say
Shiver me Timbers
I'm a-sailin' away
The fog's liftin'
And the sand's shiftin'
And I'm driftin' on out
And Ol' Captain Ahab
Ain't got nothin' on me
So come on and swallow me, don't follow me
I travel alone
Blue water's my daughter
And I'm gonna skip like a stone
And please call my missus
Tell her not to cry
My goodbye is written
By the moon in the sky
And nobody knows me
I can't fathom my stayin'
And shiver me timbers
I'm a-sailin' away
And the fog's liftin'
And the sand's shiftin'
And I'm driftin' on out
Ol' Captain Ahab
He ain't got nothin' on me
So come on and swallow me, don't follow me
I travel alone
Blue water's my daughter
And I'm skippin' like a stone
And I'm leavin' my family
And I'm leavin' my friends
My body's at home
But my heart's in the wind
Where the clouds are like headlines
On a new front page sky
And shiver me timbers
I'm a-sailin' away
Your song lyrics for your dad reminded me of a cowboy song I always thought would have been perfect for my dad.
“ When the Sun Sets on the Sage”. By Commander Cody
When the sun sets on the sage I'll say how do you do
That's when cowboys go to sleep, oh dee, oh ee ley ee who
And my pony will be waiting in the dust for me
Say adiós when the sun sets on the sage
Fare thee well, Oh fare thee well I'll say goodbye to you
Supper's waiting on the table, oh dee, oh ee ley ee who
And the cattle, they are roaming, going home to rest
Say adiós when the sun sets on the sage
The sky is all aglow, the shadows are falling
Now it's high time to go, hear those gentle voices calling
No more weeping, no more tears, I want a smile from you
We'll be parted for a while, oh dee, oh ee ley ee who
But our hearts will still remember that our love was true
Say adiós when the sun sets on the sage
2. "How Great Thou Art" ~ Lyrics ~ Carl Boberg, 1859 - 1940
~ English Translation ~ Stuart K. Hine, 1899 - 1989