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Emerald0562,
I agree with what they've said here, I'd go and get some help, ASAP because you might be over exhausting yourself. I know where you're coming from though, because my mom is all I have to help her out, even though I have an older brother who lives in Chicago who could help more (and the same thing for my 34 year old nephew who refuses to give me some breathing space by taking a turn or two with the visits), it's usually up to one "main individual" to do ALL of the work, while the others just sit on the sidelines and forget about what my mom did for them. But that's life I guess (it's made me really think about how they'd treat me should I ever get sick, and from what I see, I'd be on my own as well).
I ask God/Jesus "daily" to help keep me well for my mom, because she gets NO visitors at the rehab but me. Try to find someone to help you and get started "right away", once you get things together for yourself (I believe God might be telling you this is 'your way' of getting some much needed 'rest' for yourself right now, and that's what's important), then you could perhaps pick up (with a better perspective) from where you started. Will pray for you and your dad.
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You can go to a home health services and hire an aide
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You need to hear your doctor's message: it's not "just another bad thing happening" that will make things worse and then you have to kill yourself coping with. It's someone trying to tell you that you're already killing yourself by how you're responding to the way things already are.
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Arrange respite care a few times a week, you need help. I would go crazy if my mother did not go out to an Adult Day Center for a few hours a day. Often times the bus in not available for a week at at time and I can tell you when it has been too too much for me. You doctor is telling you that you need help, if you have to go into the hospital for any reason, your dad can be placed in a Respite Care Rehab during that time. Contact your office of aging for direction.
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I will pray for you! that is heartbreaking to hear I know I am in the exact situation. what happens to ma when I go down! You stay strong and definitely become proactive best you can!
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You need to put a plan in place. We all do. We have a very special poster here who was just diagnosed with cancer and given 6mos to live. She is scrambling to get her mom in a home. My heart breaks for her. She just posted yesterday. I cannot stop thinking about her.
If there is no one that can take over your duties you must start the process of finding him a pn assisted living place or NH if needed. It stinks but I cannot think if what else to do. Start the process now. I would imagine that his doctors could help you find the right people to talk with. Or talk with an elder attorney. I hope someone with better knowledge about how to actually start this process will help you.

Good luck and take care of yourself!!
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