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My mother in law is an assisted living facility in NM. She called 911 in one day 14 times and averages at least 3 to 4 times per week the rest of the time. The assisted living facility demanded that my husband go and stay with her to get her to stop calling 911. He did go and stay, and removed the battery from her cell phone to prevent her from calling 911. She has always been verbally abusive and mean to him and anyone else who does not cater to her wants. While he stayed with her, she kept trying to get the facility to call 911 because she claimed she was in fear for her safety from him. He never did anything to her, except hold her arms to steady her once. He felt it was better for him to leave the facility before someone actually believed her ranting and screaming while she walked up and down the halls. The facility did nothing, except deliver food and meds the entire time he was there (about 4 days). Is there anything we can do to prevent her from abusing 911 without living with her? We are in the process of finding a memory care facility for her. She is very upset that her doctor ordered the assisted living facility to control her meds. They are pretty sure she has been over dosing on several of her medications. She was diagnosed with Stage 1 Alzheimers about 8 years ago, but hasnt shown any major symptoms until recently that we can tell.

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Tell her the phone is broken and cannot be fixed. How, exactly, is a woman with dementia like this going to pursue 'litigation' against her own son for removing her cell phone battery? If you're worried, let the phone die, then put the battery back in. Who knows why the phone won't work, mother?

Abusing 911 is not a good thing. Neither is sitting with this woman 24/7 in order to prevent something that is easily preventable by removing the phone, in any way you see fit to do.

My aunt with Alz. was doing the same thing; after about 10 calls to 911 yelling Help Me, my cousin had no other alternative BUT to remove her phone. There is a phone at her AL home which can be used if necessary.

If you move MIL to a MC home, 90% of the residents there do NOT have a phone in their rooms. If I were you, I'd tell her phones are not an option once she moves in. With advanced dementia, it becomes impossible for them to remember how phones work anyway.

Wishing you the best of luck!
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The only way to stop her from abusing 911 is by taking away her phone.
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momthompson Feb 2020
Im concerned about the legal ramifications of that. She has also threatened litigation against my husband for removing her cell phone battery.
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There is no legal ramifications. She no longer can make informed decisions. After 8 yrs I would say Mom has gone passed stage one.
Lose the phone. Tell the AL staff/ Administrator that you took it. Your husband needs to realize Mom can no longer make decisions for herself. He has to now be the adult and Mom the child.
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Just deep six the phone, the facility will call you if something of importance happens. There are no legal ramifications for your husband, he just needs to stand up to her, and set his boundaries. He now needs to be in charge.
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