How can I get my mother back home when my brother and sisters say I can't?

Who has POA?

There is no POA, I don't know which one to get because there are a few. Thank you for your reply

Just tripping and hurting one's foot is not a valid reason for being in a nursing home nor would a nursing home admit someone just on that basis.  There must have been a doctor's order for her to be admitted. What is the stated reason for her being admitted on the admission documents. I see she has alzheimer's / dementia. What stage is she in?

Eyemgenie1, unless your mother has been found to be lacking mental capacity she makes the decisions about where she lives. If she wants to come back to your home and you are willing to let her, there is nothing legally stopping you.

If your mother does not have mental capacity, then you as her daughter can still arrange for her discharge from the Nursing Home; but that doesn't mean it would be a good idea, necessarily. It would be much better to get the formal legalities sorted out first, ideally applying for guardianship, and you should take advice from a lawyer who specialises in Elder Care; or at the very least discuss all the issues with an experienced social worker - the Nursing Home should be able to suggest someone for you to talk to.

But you're not so concerned about your family's opinion on this for no reason, are you? Can you perhaps tell us a bit more about how come they seem to have taken charge, and you have let them?

If mom is competent she can have POA prepared. One for financial and one for medical. If she doesn't have one, she may end up as a ward of the state and they would make all decisions regarding mom. Get them done, if mom is mentally able, now.

Eyemgenie1, I see from your profile that your Mom has Alzheimer's/Dementia. Usually a Nursing Home will not take a new patient unless they qualify to be in a Nursing Home. Sounds like Mom was ready.

I have a feeling your siblings felt that since Alzheimer's/Dementia only gets worse, they did you a favor by placing Mom in a Nursing Home. Before you know it, you are caregiving 168 hours a week, getting 2 to 3 hours of sleep at night, to a point of exhaustion, crashing and burning, then what?

Oh, by the way, when someone has Alzheimer's/Dementia and they say they want "to go home" they mean their childhood home, where life was simple and fun.

I have a feeling one of your siblings has Power of Attorney in order to sign admission for your Mom to live in a Nursing Home.

What kind of Care is your Mother receiving at the Nursing Home? My son and I got my Mom out of a rouge Personal Care Facility from H*ll. My cousin, brother and the facility teamed up against Mother and myself to have her moved out of her Independent Living Apartment where I was staying with her 24 x 7 as Caregiver. She was in a weakened condition and had several incidences where she would start a fall but I could break her fall or get her to a chair. I wanted her to have a blood screen but my cousin who was friends with her DR. and a retired Dr. himself were in agreement that I should be ignored.  After a negligence and failure to have a Dr. see Mothea while Mother was in the rouge facilities Health Care Unit I had to call 911 to get her to a hospital for treatment of pnemonis.  We found out she was anemic and malnourished.  Cousin had a small jazz band that got booked at Mother's facility. He thought he should be POA of her Health Care and so did the facility. They agreed on everything. Her Dr.'s Associate that we often saw was warning me of a lawsuit over my POA of Health Care for Mom. I didn't realize how far it would go.  They didn't bother with that.  Cousin and my brother are like your family. No real interaction with Mom. She was miserable and was mistreated by the facility.  After a few falls on her head in Personal Care due to the facilities negligence their position was that she was senile. Before they butted in She was independent showering herself, walking going to the library herself etc before they intervened. After they got involved she was a total invalid. What got her out of there is that they were so negligent in her care, I documented everything, they attacked me personally, drug me through the mud, I reported them to every possible agency, my hours were cut, their fall from grace was that they messed up Mothers Glaucoma medications so badly she went from moderate to severe glaucoma in just 3 months, bringing about Charles Bonnet Syndrom, visual hallucinations that accompany total loss of eyesight from the severe Glaucoma. My out of town brother came to my side when we he realized round the clock Nurses Aids at $25.00 per hour would run an extra $16,000.00 per month . My son called my cousin and told him we were moving Mother to another facility as soon as a room was available. No one blocked us from moving her to another facility. Our attorney yelled at me when he told me how to move her. He was no good. I'm with Mom 24 x 7 again. She has come a long way back to health in the 8 months we have been in the new facility. I have told my cousin that Mother just wants him to leave us alone, that I didn't want him to come out here, too much negativity (in him) and that he should have come to me, we are family - instead of going behind our backs. We met cousin for lunch but did not bring him back here. Watch very carefully what is going on in the nursing home, go there often, talk with other residents and talk to their family members. Hope something in my sharing will help you. Mother , myself, the kitty and my son are blessed to have this loving family time together. Mom will be 100 years old in less than 2 months. We'll pray for your situation.