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I have hired caregivers to care for my mother in my mother's home. All done legally as a household employer witholding taxes (issuing W2s) and paying employment taxes. Due to my mother's need for 24-hour care, and a lack of good caregivers near her home, I am now exploring other options.



If she were to go to a facility, it would be a nursing home. I fully believe my mother would not do well in a nursing home. She was in one for rehab and she 'shut down'. Her health deteriorated significantly.



One option I first turned down, but am now considering for lack of any better options, is from a former caregiver of my mother's. She and my mother had a definite bond and my mother would love to have her as a caregiver again. The issue is she wants my mother to live in her (the caregiver's) home. It would be as if my mother was moving in with a family member who would care for her, except this person is not a family member and will still be an employee. I don't think I can employ her as a household employer if she is not caring for my mother in my mother's home. She does not want to become an independent contractor - she wants me to pay the same way I paid the other caregivers. How would I legally pay a caregiver if my mother moves into the caregiver's home?

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The question isn't can you do it, the question is should you do it.

I think you can pretty much do anything as long as you have it written up in a very detailed contract and it is reviewed by an attorney. The topic of housing will need to be addressed specifically and what happens if the caregiver suddenly can't care for her anymore.

I personally would not be comfortable with this arrangement. What happens when the caregiver gets sick (like covid, noro virus, or something worse and more long-term)? How would this person go on vacation?

If you aren't your mom's active PoA I wouldn't even consider this arrangement. By active I mean your mother meets the criteria for you authority to be in full force (she is cognitively incapacitated). She can have no access to her own funds or know any of her passwords to sensitive information. My cousin was PoA for a relative who was totally wiped out by a very lovely caregiver who came with recommendations.

Finally, my MIL is on Medicaid in LTC in a facility. It is a very awesome place and not that expensive. It is run by a religious organization so they see the care as a mission, not a profit center. Your mother will be very cloistered in one person's home. This is not that good for her. The caregiver can become burned out with 24/7 care. Sorry, it's not a good plan.

If I were in your shoes I'd find a place close to you and relocate your mother to be as close as possible. It may seem radical and upsetting to your mother but in the long run it will enable you to provide the best care as possible.
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I would consult an attorney if I were you. This doesn't sound right. Its throwing up red flags. If she doesn't want to become an independent contractor that means she doesn't have to pay taxes meaning she would be self employed. The other way you were doing it the insurance for someone getting hurt they would have coverage even your mother. This way she is suggesting to you I WOULD NOT DO. The insurance for her and your mother you would have to look at and how would it be if something should happen to the caregiver then where would your mother be.

I would look into something around you. Go looking at nursing homes and assisted living homes I bet you can find one that your mother would love to be in don't go the other way.

Prayers to you and your mother.
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I am not a lawyer, I just play one on agingcare.com, so I will tell you when I'm making stuff up...

First, I know (for a fact) that having clients live in a Caregiver's home is not that uncommon. It can actually be very practical for both parties and cost-effective for the client. Oftentimes, the client does become part of the family and bonds with the children and other family members giving her a much richer life experience and better care - it could beat sitting in a cold room watching Maury by a mile!

Here is the part I am making up... I would GUESS instead of a Caregiver agreement, it could be a simple week-to-week Room and Board Arrangement. AND, if the landlord (caregiver) gave extra attention to the tenant (client) yaeh for the landlord.

Here is the other part I am making up... because I am not an accountant or a tax guy either... I would GUESS under that arrangement you wouldn't have to give her a 1099 or W2 and she could get some pretty massive tax write-offs for her expenses of running the household by filing Schedule C. I don't know...

The only thing I would caution you on is to make sure things like when you can visit, overseeing the food, etc are clear in advance, and make sure you don't get yourself roped into a long-term agreement if it doesn't work out.. always have a Plan B.

I could be completely wrong, but at least is another perspective, right??? ~BRAD
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RedVanAnnie May 2022
How interesting your suggestions are! I love your "different perspective" on the idea of a client living in caregiver's home. I had no idea that was a common type of arrangement.

I don't know if your ideas are feasible, but they are worth exploring. Most advice has been immediately suspicious of the caregiver's motives, but you put a different slant on things.
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I agree with Gaeton777 concerns.
And would the caregiver have other caregivers? We all know one person can not do this job alone. So would SHE be hiring others or would it be you hiring them to work in her home?
Will this person's insurance cover your mom if something should happen?
Would your mom technically be a renter or tenant? If so does the village/city allow that?
Is the home set up properly? Easy access? ADA compliant?
Who else lives in the home? Have they all been background checked? What about frequent visitors?

I have a lot more questions but I think you get the idea. It is not as simple as moving mom and having this person be her caregiver.
Being in a rehab facility for rehab is different than finding Memory Care or Assisted Living facility or even a Skilled Nursing facility. The anticipation in rehab is that you will GO home, that is the goal. With SNF, MC, AL the staff will get to know you and there is the mindset that this IS home.
And there may be a decline for a bit but she will get used to the people and the place. She may well have the same decline moving from her home into another with strange people around her.
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I’m sorry but I wonder why she wants to move her into her home I would seriously have concerns and like others have said it’s a 24/7 job you can’t go away for a break go on holiday or stay away too long so I would seriously consider looking for proper alternatives
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Talk to an atty to help you write up a contract (that includes wording about mom can be removed at any time, for any reason, no legal contracts/wills can be signed by mom, etc)
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Perhaps the facility your mom was in previously was not for her. Doesn't mean there are no others. Once in a facility, there is always a period of adjustment for new folks. This whole idea of moving mom into the caregivers home sends up a lot of red flags for me as well a others as you can see. Not saying it wouldn't work, but too many things could go wrong. I'm wondering if it would be a foster care situation? But again, there needs to be full background checks on each and every person living in that house. Something doesn't sound right somewhere. An elder care attorney might be your first stop. A thorough contract needs to be drawn up with you being fully POA and allowing you to visit at any time. Then there is always the question... will your mom like it at caregivers home?
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And how long until this caregiver moving your mom in, has her right a new will. You could never on the drop of a time stop in to see mom. I would stay clear, but that is just me.
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Ask for references and make those calls. Contact an Elder Law Attorney and ask about the legalities and prevention of wills being changed during the stay. Also ask about 24 hour baby cam, visiting unannounced and whatever else may be necessary.

Visiting Angels may have some savvy advice too and here on this website is AgingCare.com.
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As others have suggested I would consult an elder care attorney.

My other thought is that if you put her with this former care giver is that if the caregiver has any help.

If she is alone it will eventually be to much work for her. When would the caregiver get a break or rest. Also who would watch your mom when the caregiver has to go out, doctor, market, etc.
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