Moved parents to FL 1 1-2 yrs ago. Both have dementia. Stepdad died October 2017. Mom now at beautiful 2 bed 2 bath apartment 1/2 Mile from daughter. (Me, only child) 24/7 caregivers that mom loves. However, mom HATES it here and HATES me for bringing her here. She forgets who died and when and thinks she was married a short time (52yrs). Wants to go home and, yes, she knows home. Should I find a care manager in Illinois and move her home? There is a "friend" in Illinois that seems to want her money. I fear I cannot keep her safe in Illinois while I live in Florida but this is killing me.
But she can still make new nice and warm memories in Florida, with her only daughter nearby, caring for her and loving her.
You are the adult now. You need to make decisions that protect your mom, not only that please your mom...specially when what she wants is not necessarily what she needs.
Prayers for strength and clarity!
As jjarz and Grammy had mentioned above, time to start using "theraputic fibs" to delay your Mom from thinking about moving. Fibs such as "can't move right now, 2 feet of snow in Illinois". "Your home was damage in a storm, it's being fixed but will take time". "you will miss [caregivers names] and they would be very sad to see you leave", etc.
Just keep delaying the idea. Eventually your Mom will forget about moving.
My heartfelt sympathy to you and your family on the passing of your Step-Dad.
You probably can't reason with her if she has dementia. She may be wanting to go back in time like a lot of seniors to her youth. I wouldn't move her. I'd just try to distract her and/or use the therapeutic fib like Jjariz suggested. It's a lot more important in my opinion that she be close to you as her advocate than to be geographically where she wants to be.