My sister is POA of my mother. My father is deceased. My father’s Will states that she and I receive an even split of the money from the sale of my parents' home. My mom is in a nursing home. She has dementia. My sister gutted my parents' house down to the bone and spent $200k on luxurious renovations. She told me it would only be maximum of $45k for little fix-its to put it up for sale. She never disclosed the large-scaled expensive renovations to me. She showed me once it was all done. Now she said that once the house sells, she’s going to instantly take $100k from my inheritance portion to pay for half of these highly expensive renovation costs. Does she have the legal right to give me “what she sees fit” for my inheritance monies???? Can she legally do this????? Help!
Sometimes in order to get top dollar from a home sale, many updates and renovations need to happen. I see it all the time here where I live. If she is the only PoA she is under no obligation to disclose anything about your Mom's affairs to you now or ever. If you think fraud or financial abuse is being committed, you will need to take hard evidence to an attorney to fight it on your Mother's behalf.
As PoA, I hope your sister is keeping very detailed record of what she was and is spending for your Mom.
Do you have anything in writing from your sister of her intent to take funds off your inheritance? What documentation exists to prove the accuracy and validity of her expenditures?
The current downturn of stocks and house sales probably will cost her in making a heftier profit. But as house is owned outright she just has to sell it for more than its renovations and property tax & insurance costs to be good. I’ll bet you a case of Prosecco that Sissy hubs is beyond glad she has his Mil house to deal with otherwise Sissy would be riding his butt on their doing flips.
Then, there are numerous steps to settle the estate - if she has had to go on Medicaid due to lack of her own funds (because they were spent to renovate her house and then sell it), Medicaid. has the right to recover the cost of all the care that she received. They can put a lien on the house so that a sale makes them the first creditor.
If your mother lives for 5 full years past the date of the last bill for the renovation, then Medicaid may not go after the house.
Medicaid is the payer of last resort and is required to ensure that all other resources have been used for the elder's benefit.
As Geaton states, I hope she is keeping very good records.
Please don't count on receiving any inheritance - while it was your Dad's wish, the reality is more complex. I'm sorry your sister has done this, causing distress for you.
My sister is married to a multi-millionaire. They are extremely wealthy. My sister paid for these renovations up-front with their own money. My parents home was built in 1970 and in 2006, my sister coaxed my father to spend up to $100k to completely renovate the house - both outside/inside and landscaping so their home was in upgraded beautiful condition prior to my sister's (hobby) of changing things out (just for the thrill of it all), tearing down walls, chandelier's, a wine frig, gigantic oversized marble kitchen island, change in garage doors/front doors (they were beautiful and upgraded to begin with). This is not a wealthy neighborhood by no means. I did not ever sign anything agreeing to this massive expensive renovations. My sister's husband has a secretary that keeps all the expenses accurate and detailed about everything pertaining to my mother. Every year, my sister makes grand-scaled renovation/changes to her own 2 homes (both worth over 8 million). She knows I am a single divorced mom, working entry level job (it's all I can get), living in an affordable low-income one bedroom apartment. My daughter has the bedroom and I sleep on the couch. I can't afford the cost of rent where I live for a 2 bedroom apartment. She knows I've moved 6 times in 8 years due to financial crippling from a under-handed crooked ex-husband. He works for his family's highly successful company and they hide his large sums of income from me and the court. I have worked at very successful companies and "in-the-day" I was able to climb the corporate ladder without a 4 year degree. Those days are over in this society! When I first me my ex-husband, I had my beautiful townhome in a wealthy area, my BMW sports car, and a great career. Fast forward, I am now 58 and my ex-husband wiped me out so it is a sensitive subject about my wealthy sister spending part of my inheritance frivolously when I am financially crippled. In all, after reading your feedback, it appears there is nothing I can do but again, I am most appreciative of your feedback. I am also not interested in a drag-out ugly fight over money either. I just wanted my sister to be reasonable and courteous in consulting me before bulldozing over me and always making sure I somehow suffer and I didn't know people can make these type of decisions when it relates directly to other people's inheritance shares. My sister handed me the spreadsheet of all the renovation costs last night, has put my parent's home on the market at an unbelievable inflatable price and said if it doesn't sell, then she's renting it (my childhood home) to her girlfriend for the time being.
How is it that Medicaid is footing the bill along with your 'father's good fortune in stocks'?? How does a wealthy woman qualify for Medicaid in the first place, while her multi millionaire daughter is out there spending this 'inheritance' she isn't even entitled to spend yet?
You mention your dad's will. Was the house in his name only? Did he not leave everything to your mother? Including the house? If he left her the house or she was already on the house as an equal owner, it might not really matter what dad's will say. What does mom's say?
Kind of seems like a mess. I hope it's better than I'm thinking, but maybe you'll just have to accept this none sense or waste a lot of time and energy (and maybe money) fighting it.
Good luck.
I had to do that, and lawyer said why didn't you come to me sooner? Don't put it off.
your mom is on Medicaid ? Does the home belong to your mom ? Medicaid will probably claw back after her death.
To put into a house $200k in renovation costs, your sister is forgetting that the neighborhood sets the price, not the over-the-top renovations. I've been in real estate for over 30 years, and have seen this mistake over and over.
You mentioned that your sister is married to a multi-millionaire. Don't forget that even multi-millionaires can be up to their eyeballs in debt. Those who brag and show off shiny new objects aren't as wealthy as they say.
You are NOT responsible for any of her remodeling. It was her choice. I would speak to an Elder Law Attorney to get his/her ideas on how to handle this matter.
Insofar as your dad's excellent stocks, well, I know MY portfolio is down about 20% since we have entered into a bear market. The value of those stocks might not outlive your mom; you might need all the value of that house to continue to pay for mom's care.
In other words, I think this "worry" over your share of an inheritence is somewhat pre-mature. When the time comes, if there is still a question as to your share, you can probably challenge that when the estate comes into probate.
Where I am an “as is” tends to be assessed value of the land as per tax collector data plus 30% at best. Our housing stock is way older, some still with tube / cloth wiring & it’s a fortune to get that changed up as just a few electrical co that will do these; lots of walls are lathe & plaster, $$$ to fix.
It sounds like, Your dads will left everything to his wife (it was a “pour over” will) and only upon mom’s death will there ever be any distribution of assets of her estate to her beneficiaries, which are you and your Sister. You really should not count on an inheritance ahead of time; there could not actually be anything substantial left.
So NOT until mom dies and probate runs it’s course, will there ever be an inheritance. Sissy is POA so Sissy in charge of any decisions regarding moms care, how it paid for or what happens with moms assets while alive. There is no requirement to have mom die and actually leave an inheritance…. If $ needs to be spent by the POA on moving mom to a way more expensive place or hiring extra aides for mom or doing maintenance or reno to moms property, it can be done by the POA.
If in fact Sissy has fronted the $$$ to do the most recent repairs / renovations, I’d guess that in fact there really isn’t much money liquid (like in savings or sitting in a bank account) as moms cash is all dedicated to paying for her care. I imagine that’s Sissy is spending her own $ to get a better price on moms place and plans to be fully reimbursed from the Act of Sale $. Sounds like your BIL has his staff keep precise records so all this can be verified and to the penny paid to Sis & beyond ok for any legal challenges or future probate filings.
Your Sister as POA has a fiduciary duty to your mom as to how $ is spent and how moms assets are managed. For you to challenge her as POA, you have to, HAVE TO, have an attorney, take her to court and show via forensic accounting of moms finances for past 2-3 years that Sissy is not doing her fiduciary duty and a guardian needs to be named. Your attorneys could file to have it be you, but if you have your own financial issues, iffy credit reports, no secure income, the court isn’t going to appoint you….. either court determines you have no reason to challenge Sissy as POA or an outside guardian is named & they get total control of mom, her health care and her home & her $; plus an outside guardian can bill professional hourly rates to administer moms affairs. Watch what you wish for…….
I’m not trying to be harsh but it comes across as you are… in the words of an Aunt of mine…. “1 will reading from being able to buy a used car”. Should you challenge your Sister, all the negative decisions you have made will be brought out & in detail by her attorney to the court. For your own sake, don’t go there. Let Sissy get moms house sold, get reimbursed for her costs, pay for whatever great care mom needs and hopefully when mom finally dies there actually is $ left that can be distributed to you & Sissy as per moms will.
If she could afford that kind of money then she should have spent it on her medical expenses and care she cannot spend it to renovate a house that is part of estate
POA way different. If a POA pretty much shows reasonable good intent on use of the elders $ & assets, their good. OPs Sister has shown her costs on the reno, Sissys not hiding costs. If OP wants to challenge POA, she needs to either get mom to change her POA to her or file for guardianship. The parents chose Sissy decades ago, complaining on $ dad spent years ago as “She coaxed dad to do this” or on current costs the POA Sister is fronting from her own wallet, is imo a waste of time and energy.
There is no self dealing. It’s not the moms $ being used on reno’s.
Sis apparently views use of her $$$$ to do work on 50+ yr old house owned by her mom as a sensible. Even if Sissy has a Fton of $, sinking 100K plus having to be around to make sure work is done correctly, isn’t ever taken lightly in my experience. Sissy may be over investing in the house based on comps when it eventually sells. But maybe not. As long as it sells and makes a profit payable to the mom, the intention of Sissys actions as the chosen POA can be viewed as in the moms interest.
Sissy has NOT told the OP she needs to pay 50% of the reno.
Sissy is fronting the costs according to OP.
OP is not out any $ for anything done with the house.
She has no harm at present in my not an attorney opinion. OP is fixated on her supposed inheritance. She fails to realize there may be no inheritance as mom just might outlive her current investment portfolio and need to draw on house sale $ to continue to private pay for that NH plus pay for regular property costs, like taxes & insurance. If mom is paying $ 15,800 a mo NH and $10K a yr on the house in her name, that’s almost $ 200K a year. We have another month like the last week, moms $ might be on fumes by EOY& needs house sale $.
If your parents made your sister POA and executor, they gave her the legal right to maintain their property as she thinks best. If she's putting her own money into the renovations, she must have some basis to think there will be a benefit/a higher sale price for the property. Yes, the amount sounds like a lot--but, have you bought or sold property lately? I can't believe how much prices have risen. Our house was built in the early 70s, and I can affirm that a house that age is likely to need work. We've remodeled twice and spent well into six figures, and my husband is talking about doing more soon. And I live in Iowa where home prices are not too outrageous (yet). Our home is pretty average, not some extravagant mansion.
It's possible that your sister is trying to maximize the sale price so that there are more resources for mom's care, or even that when the time comes, you are able to inherit more. If she is already wealthy it doesn't seem like she has a particular need to go to the trouble or spend the money to benefit herself.
I can see where being told that she will reimburse herself from the estate (half from your portion), then presented with a spreadsheet of the costs, would be a little overwhelming and scary. It sounds like it's not the decision you would have made. Perhaps a conversation, rather than all the accounting detail would be a better way to go. Hopefully she will be understanding and willing to share her thought process with you.
Did she use mom's money to pay for repairs? Or her own? If her own money, she probably can't tie that back to moms finances.
You need to see atty to ask these questions.
Another thing, any proceeds from house in mom's name can't be used as inheritance while she's alive. Inheritance is what's left over after death