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He changes his underwear and shirt to fool me. Why do they hate bathing?

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Jeraldine, I have noticed for myself that taking a shower is like going to the gym same as what Ahmijoy had written here earlier, and here I use to be a gym rat for many years. It can be very exhausting for many seniors. Especially with your hubby having memory lost.

Another thing, some seniors become claustrophobic when in a shower. Especially if there are glass doors. I know for myself, I need to keep the far door open a couple of feet.

Then there is the fear of falling. If your hubby is using a moisturizing liquid soap and/or hair conditioners, it will make the floor of the tub/shower feel like an ice rink, even with a tub mat inside.

Towel drying isn't easy. I find myself hopping around trying to get one foot and leg dry, can be a challenge. So easy to get one's feet tangled up in the towel.

Then if hubby needs to blow dry his hair, that can be tiring on his arms.

Whew !!

An elder doesn't need to shower daily, twice a week or once a week is good enough, unless they are doing hard labor. If hubby is a Depends wearer, baby wipes work quite well between showers.
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I have to go take a shower now and I’ve been putting it off for 2 hours. For me, at 65, with arthritis, high BP and fibromyalgia, it’s like a workout at the gym. Plus, if I slip and fall, I could lie there for days because I’m alone.

Make sure your shower/tub is completely outfitted with grab bars and maybe even a seat. In a non-confrontational way, ask him what’s going on. Ask him if he’s afraid of falling or what. Then try to fix what he tells you.
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My 94 yo mother lies too. I think she is afraid to fall, which is understandable. I have recommended that she redo her MB, putting in a walk-in shower, removing the tub. Nope. She is the most oppositional person I have ever met...and, she smells terrible.
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