Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
An elder attorney would be a good start, all kinds of caveats depending on the state you reside in. As for the emotional issues, keep reading around here, lots of great information.
What kind of legal advice? The money that comes in from the sell of the house, be diligent about planning for MediCaid in the future. Someone might can help you more if you give more details, BUT if you want absolute, legal & sound advice, you need an elder care attorney.
As for emotional advice, lots of good listeners & good advice can be found here from people who’ve been through this.
Legal issues: absolutely find an elder attorney! I have read enough stories on this site about kids getting "stuck" with parents who become overwhelming, with no way to change the living situation. I'm not sure how my attorney would handle it, but he said if we ever think about doing that to give him a call. He will draw up paperwork for us that would prevent us being able to stay if we become too much of a burden for any children we might live with.
An elder lawyer can also provide you with answers to questions that you don't even know yet, like setting up a trust, qualifying for medicaid, getting papers in order, etc.
Emotional issues: I agree with the previous poster to read what you can on this site!
Legal issues are best handled by an attorney who knows trusts and estates and elder law. Selling his house and ensuring that the money is available to him for the rest of his life is best handled by an accountant and financial planner. Emotional issues are the tough void because every family is different. If your father is religious, talking with a spiritual advisor can help.
Your profile says your father lives in independent living. Why is he considering leaving that arrangement?
As for moving in with one of his 3 children, I would caution against rushing into that. Inevitably, the one child shoulders significantly more of the burden - and caregiving can quickly become a burden - and can become resentful and burned out. Then what are you going to do?
Caregiving never goes as planned, and your father's needs will only increase as he gets older and whatever ails him gets worse.
Sorry, Elder Attorney is thrown around a lot. On another post, an EA wants 18k, 9k upfront. They aren't cheap.
If Dad sells his house it has to be at Market Value. I would get it appraised. I was talked out of this by my realtor. She said she could get comparisons. Problem, my Moms house was in need of lots of repairs. What the township felt it was worth and what it really was was two different things. Once it sells, the money should be put in an acct for His care only. No gifts given, no loans made....his care. If Dad ever needs Medicaid, they will want to see how his money was spent.
Your profile days that Dad is in an Independent living. Why do you want to move him? Does he need more care? If so, why not sell the house and place him in an AL? He will have people and activities.
Its very hard to bring a parent into your home. It really depends on the personalities involved. You have to realize there are spouses involved. There have been posts where a son brings his parent to live with him and expects the wife to do the caring. Even when the parent is a male. One person brought her Mom from another state not realizing she had declined much more than she realized. A number regret bringing a parent to live with them and now they are stuck because the parent is capable of making their own decisions and won't move out. Think carefully before you make that decision.
The person caring for Dad needs the POAs. So be very careful whose hands you place Dad.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
As for emotional advice, lots of good listeners & good advice can be found here from people who’ve been through this.
An elder lawyer can also provide you with answers to questions that you don't even know yet, like setting up a trust, qualifying for medicaid, getting papers in order, etc.
Emotional issues: I agree with the previous poster to read what you can on this site!
Your profile says your father lives in independent living. Why is he considering leaving that arrangement?
As for moving in with one of his 3 children, I would caution against rushing into that. Inevitably, the one child shoulders significantly more of the burden - and caregiving can quickly become a burden - and can become resentful and burned out. Then what are you going to do?
Caregiving never goes as planned, and your father's needs will only increase as he gets older and whatever ails him gets worse.
If Dad sells his house it has to be at Market Value. I would get it appraised. I was talked out of this by my realtor. She said she could get comparisons. Problem, my Moms house was in need of lots of repairs. What the township felt it was worth and what it really was was two different things. Once it sells, the money should be put in an acct for His care only. No gifts given, no loans made....his care. If Dad ever needs Medicaid, they will want to see how his money was spent.
Your profile days that Dad is in an Independent living. Why do you want to move him? Does he need more care? If so, why not sell the house and place him in an AL? He will have people and activities.
Its very hard to bring a parent into your home. It really depends on the personalities involved. You have to realize there are spouses involved. There have been posts where a son brings his parent to live with him and expects the wife to do the caring. Even when the parent is a male. One person brought her Mom from another state not realizing she had declined much more than she realized. A number regret bringing a parent to live with them and now they are stuck because the parent is capable of making their own decisions and won't move out. Think carefully before you make that decision.
The person caring for Dad needs the POAs. So be very careful whose hands you place Dad.